“Men are what their mothers made them.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Ice Cream Museums
Not a whole lot of teenagers and kids would voluntarily choose to spend their weekend at an art museum or exhibit. And not a whole lot of parents would voluntarily dish out $30 to watch their children play in gumballs.
But all bets are off in this Museum of Ice Cream in which visitors tour through what could only be described as Willy Wonka on crack.
To add to the appeal, the museum encourages visitors to interact with the props and take selfies for Instagram. Literally, people pay thirty dollars to go there and take pics of themselves.
Admittedly, it looks pretty cool and fun. But if you’re living in a time period in which the staple of art is premised around the narcissistic need to feed the human ego with pictures of themselves, it might be time to re-evaluate our priorities as a species.
(But, seriously, I would totally go just to immerse myself in rainbow sprinkles). Would you?
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Flirting is hard.
Sober you is like, “He’s cute and seems nice. He probably has a girlfriend and wants to be left alone while he enjoys an adult beverage and watches men on TV throw a ball back and forth. I’ll just keep staring into my guava-tini awkwardly and hope he doesn’t notice I haven’t shaved my legs in 2 years.”
Drunk you is like, “This hot guy to the left of me DEFINITELY doesn’t want to be left alone. I’ll regale him with my witty banter and he’ll be so entranced by my 10/10 looks, he’ll probably propose to me tonight.”
It’s cringeworthy to recall all the awkward times you’ve drunkenly hit on someone that clearly wasn’t reciprocating your advances (or maybe you just weren’t winking hard enough. When in doubt, just wink a lot more. It’ll totally work.)
.If you’re the bartender that has to watch this sort of shit-show unfold on a daily basis, it goes beyond just being cringe-worthy and flies straight into Horrorville.
Here, bartenders tell the most awkward pickup artists they’ve ever seen at work.
Laugh It Off
Because sometimes death can be just as humorous as life, if you can keep your sense of humor beyond the grave…