Coping With Poor Health and a Lack of Sports

Coping With Poor Health and a Lack of Sports

The Nightcap

Nightcap for 6-21-2018


“I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.”
– Winston Churchill

Alcohol: Cure For The Common Cold?

I’m sure most of us had that one parent or crazy coworker that swore drinking a hot toddy or a shot of tequila would actually help “burn off” any cold, virus, or bacterial infection you were suffering from.

No? If you’ve never heard that, then congratulations… you don’t surround yourself with alcoholics like yours truly.

I can remember at an early age my mom making herself a hot cup of tea when she was feeling under the weather. She’d use some echinacea blend, steep it for five minutes, add lemon and some honey – and then put in about a gallon of whiskey.

Ok, I’m totally exaggerating on how generous her whiskey pour was, but it certainly wasn’t a teaspoon. Then she would look at all of us kids with assertion and just say, ” it’s for my throat.” This loon was justifying essentially doing shots of Wild Turkey at 8 in the morning because it supposedly “burned off whatever was inside of her.” Sure, mom. It clearly has done wonders with burning off some of those brain cells.

Last time I had strep, my coworker told me to drink tequila, which is something I tend to avoid ANYWAY, let alone when I have a temp of 102 and I can barely drink water. So, apparently my mom isn’t the only crazy person out there that turns to moonshine in their time of need. (Albeit, it’s probably no worse for you than NyQuil.)

So, I decided to look up any information that might buttress these crazy claims and here is what I found.

Nothing But Nope

If you’re into sports, the off-season is kind of the worst – particularly if you like football, basketball, or hockey.

Basketball just ended, which left us with soccer to entertain our short attention spans for awhile, but essentially we are only going to be left with baseball soon.

Now, I don’t mean to knock baseball. I recognize it requires a lot of talent but HOLY HELL is it boring. I mean, you have to have an impressive attention span to sit through 9 innings of that – even more if both teams are tied up.

Watching a game should be a mandatory first date. If you take a woman you just met out to a baseball game and she can sit through an entire game without suggesting you both leave early to stab your eyes out, you have a keeper.

For those of us who hate baseball, summer can be difficult, but at least we have the excitement of the draft picks! The NBA draft officially starts today and here’s what we have to look forward to.

Jerry Seinfeld and Cardi B: Between Two Ferns With Zach Galifianakis

Jerry Seinfeld and Cardi B sit down with Zach Galifianakis for an interview without coffee, cars, or money moves. Watch Here